Sunday, December 2, 2012

The History of Ugly Christmas Sweater Parties

'Twas the Night Before Finals: The History of The Ugly Christmas Sweater Party...

Ugly Christmas Sweater Parties originated like the Post-it note: by accident. No, a 3M scientist was not goofing around in a lab, but the birth of the legendary Ugly Xmas Party tradition was one big fat accident. It started with elementary education teachers. They began sporting the sweaters like it was their job. This had a trickle down effect...slowly but surely infecting soccer moms, soccer grandmoms, art and music teachers, retired people, volunteers, PTA-goers, thrift store shoppers and the racks of Kohl's department store. Ugly Christmas Sweater Fever (as it is clinically referred to) had reached epidemic proportions.

No one died, fortunately, but this huge mass of people were really really ridiculously confused. For some reason, they thought they looked good. Really good. Super stylish. Cute as a button. Hollidazzlin. But no, they were sadly mistaken.

They looked hideous. For a long time, the non-Ugly Xmas sweater wearers remained in the closet. No one wanted to make the first move to alert these sad souls of their super sad situation.

A flip switched somewhere around 2007. Many attribute it to white people*. White people and their undying thirst for theme parties. One college co-ed sported a said sweater to a regular Christmas party. Everyone loved "Ugly Sweater Guy." Next thing you know, people are calling their elementary education teachers, their soccer moms and their local thrift stores in search of a sweater to wear to the next party. They know they've seen they must track them down.

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